For Life: A Memoir of Living and Dying – and Flying

After I swim, I watch an osprey hanging in mid-air. If those who came before really do dissolve and dissipate, and if their cells really are all around us, then that bird is held there by Mum and Peter and billions of others of the long-dead. The osprey is kept aloft by absences. Perhaps I am too.

When her husband doesn’t answer his phone, Ailsa Piper knows something is wrong. She calls their neighbour, and minutes later, he rings back. ‘Oh, Ailsa. I’m so sorry,’ he says. Five words to change a life.

Wanting to flee her shattered world in Melbourne, Ailsa migrates north to Sydney. She makes a nest. She learns to swim. She walks the harbour cliffs to the lighthouse, meeting the locals: winter swimmers and shoreline philosophers.

But we never leave our past behind. Ailsa is drawn back south, and even further back, to the west’s aqua waters …


‘As strong and as light as a bird, For Life is a loving, courageous account of the black mess of grief and the slow return to a flourishing life. Perhaps it’s only by staring death in the face that one can wholeheartedly celebrate the profound, joyful luck of being alive, and this book does both. Unflinching and tender, it shows us how to grieve. And it enacts the deep, human need to properly lay the dead to rest. You will cry reading this book, but you will also look up and see the world afresh, newly aware of the pulsing beat of your heart, grateful for the sun in your eyes.’ Charlotte Wood, author of Stone Yard Devotional

‘Finely wrought, and exquisitely told, Ailsa Piper’s memoir describes the art of moving forward, even in the face of unbearable loss. For Life is, in the end, a celebration – of love, of nature, of language itself. I loved it for about a million reasons, often reading through a veil of tears.’ Sofie Laguna, author of Infinite Splendours

‘This beautiful book made my heart sing and break at the same time.’
Michael Robotham, author of Storm Child

‘Piper’s writing makes you want to dance, sing, soar, be held and be free. I was filled with an urge to both dive into the ocean, and to breathe in the world deeply.’
Suzie Miller, author of Prima Facie

‘A beautiful, courageous and unflinching testament to life. To love shadowed by loss. To the howl of impermanence salved by beauty and the interconnectedness of all things. A book of hope and humanity.’ Sarah Winman, author of Still Life

‘In this exploration – fossick, ramble, dance, even romp – in search of good ways to live on alone after losing a husband whose loss has laid waste to her, Ailsa Piper’s many-sided humanity flowers and shines. It is not a dark book – it is a cornflower-blue and sun-filled book, looking death, which is always hovering, straight in the eye.’ Robert Dessaix, author of What Days Are For

‘If it takes a community to raise a child, Ailsa Piper shows us that it also takes a community to draw a person away from the tilting world of sudden grief to find a new accommodation with life. One beat-perfect scene made me gasp with the hard question it asks and the even gutsier answer it provides. Filled with Piper’s characteristic warmth and intelligence, For Life is also a superbly drawn portrait of a place and the precious everyday doings of the natural world. A beautifully put-together story told with skill, candour – and love.’ Vicki Hastrich, author of Night Fishing

‘Tender and wise. A story about loss that shines with life, like the shattered sea glass Piper collects on Sydney shores …’ Kristina Olsson, author of Shell

‘A deeply companionable read. Quiet, profound and full of wonderment.’ Hannie Rayson, author of Hello Beautiful

‘Ailsa Piper’s superpower is noticing, paying meticulous attention to the exquisite minutiae of daily life – the gifted writer’s greatest tool. In this raw yet delicate memoir, Ailsa’s poetic sensibilities elevate these small things – seahorses, birds in fight, flowers, the little still lifes she curates around her home, the foibles and nobility of her fellow humans – to art. There is wisdom and poetry and a sense of the sacred here in her rich evocations of her father’s poignant final chapter, a rendering of Covid lockdowns that almost makes one nostalgic for its deprivations and oddities, her ardent love and heart-wrenching grief for a life partner gone too soon, whom we come to love too. She casts a spell that leaves the reader incapable of un-noticing the truth; that life is speaking to us in every moment. For Life evokes stillness, clarity, appreciation. It left me more attentive to life, its beauty and challenges, my own idiosyncrasies, the delicacy of love. What a gift.’ Tim Baker, author of Patting the Shark

Format: Paperback
Pages: 352
Imprint: Allen & Unwin
Publication date: 02/07/2024